


Fallen Leaves

by wordsarelifealways



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, around season 9, we're pretending Cas got to stay in the bunker after he Fell alright
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-10
Updated: 2015-09-10
Packaged: 2018-04-20 02:03:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4769429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wordsarelifealways/pseuds/wordsarelifealways
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Since the Fall, Castiel has taken to noticing the smaller parts of being human.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fallen Leaves

Dean had never really noticed the sound dried leaves made while he walked through them. Usually there were bigger things on his mind. If he was on a hunt he knew better than to crunch over leaves unless he lost rock paper scissors and was playing bait and in his down time he couldn’t give a shit what sort of noise leaves made.

But Cas?

Cas had a newfound appreciation for the small things in life since the fall.

Dean knew Cas missed being an angel, knew he longed to go to a home that was boarded up to him and most of the winged dicks.

But there were definitely moments.

They were never long, or particularly profound, but they were small moments of joy that made Cas light up brighter than his grace ever did. As someone who knew more than his fair share about darkness, Dean wasn’t about to squash those moments for Cas. Sure, he made the odd joke, but he was never serious.

He just wasn’t sure what to do with the weird feeling in his gut he got when Cas had one of those moments. Sure, he’d made his move and things were different than they used to be, but during Cas’ moments Dean felt like this could be something more.

And so he found himself stood outside the bunker watching Cas as he walked through piles of dried out brown leaves that crackled under his shoes.

It was a distant memory, but Dean still remembered it. Before the fire. Stomping around their garden listening to the leaves crunch and laughing as the hairs on the back of his neck stood up at the sound.

In a way, Cas was like a child now. He was experiencing things for the first time now he was human. Sure, things happened to him while he was an angel but the details that caught Cas’ attention now must have seemed so trivial to him when he had the ability to click his fingers and do whatever the hell he pleased and fought in heavenly battles more often than not and saved the world that time.

But now he was human like the rest of them, he was noticing things. It was nice. At first it had been more surreal than anything, but now Dean just had to smile. It kind of reminded him of when Sam was little.

Except now Dean wasn’t going hungry and he wasn’t quite as vigilant about having his eyes on Sam at all times. It was like a redo, getting some of those moments again without some of the shit attached to them.

And, he wasn’t gonna lie, it was just nice to see Cas smiling.

Everyone in the bunker knew Cas still felt like shit for his unintentional part in the mass evacuation of heaven, but no one acknowledged it. Mostly because no one knew what to say that would help.

So they just did their best to keep Cas occupied.

Dean had taught Cas how to cook some basic meals. Sam had showed Cas some tricks for researching in case Cas ever needed it; Cas might not be pumped with grace but he still knew his stuff so they both knew it was just a distraction but Cas played along. Kevin had tried to teach Cas to read some of the words on the tablet, but the kid had also been muttering about salsa so it didn’t last too long.

It was moments like this though where Dean suspected all the awful stuff in Cas’ mind was briefly pushed aside to make room for this new experience. He watched as Cas walked along, grinding leaves up under his heel.

They had only come out to get some fresh air and watch the sun go down. Dean had a feeling Cas felt claustrophobic in the bunker; he frequently eyed the walls and the ceilings and looked back to the entrance. It probably shouldn’t have come as a surprise, Castiel had been an angel. Something larger than life contained in something tiny and insignificant in comparison to his true form. Dean should have guessed he wouldn’t enjoy being closed in somewhere now.

“It’s a pleasing sound. I never noticed that before.” Cas said after a few minutes of looking down at the leaves and crushing them. Briefly Dean wondered if this reminded Cas of being an angel, of having the ability to crush something so easily.

“You didn’t usually have time to notice shit like this, Cas.” Dean pointed out. “You don’t get to stop and smell the roses when you’re busy saving the world.”

“No.” Cas’ smile faded slightly and Dean winced.

“I didn’t mean you’re useless now. I just…since you pulled me out of the pit you’ve been nonstop. It’s time you had a break, man. Go stomp on leaves and watch sunsets and fish and whatever the hell else people do. Whatever you wanna do, Cas. It’s time you got to be you and not some pawn in the universe’s sick games or a soldier against evil. You’ve earned some down time.”

Cas went quiet as he thought it over, looking around at all the leaves.

“Maybe it’s apt I fell in autumn.” He murmured. “Maybe it’s time I started fresh like these trees will.”

Dean made an active effort not to raise his eyebrows. But, Christ, Cas was the only guy he knew who could look at fallen leaves and consider it a metaphor for his own life.

“Yeah, Cas. You could reinvent yourself as an oak tree.” He snorted and Cas looked back at him flatly.

“You always were better with your body than your mouth. Get over here and help me crush the last of these leaves before it rains.” Cas grabbed Dean’s hand, effectively eliminating Dean’s choice in the matter, and tugged him over into the pile of leaves.

“Whatever you say, tiny tree.” Dean laughed. “Although…” He mused, pulling Castiel closer to him. “I can think of some more fun noises we could be making together.”

**Author's Note:**

> Find me at whoismisha.tumblr.com for other drabbles


End file.
